The Goose of the End Times

We like to think that Canada is our friend. They are our compatriots. Our neighbor nation of the north keeping back the frozen wastes from the United States. They’re our best access to the polar pole of the north. They’re the neighbor that provides the best in maple syrup and a moral role model for many of us. And yet, they have been allowing the most insidious of creatures to flock to the United States without even attempting to prevent their entry from our borders. Did you think that Canada Geese control in NJ was a joke? You won’t be laughing much when you’re strolling through a park enjoying your fine, gorgeous day when sudden; the beating of wings surrounds you. Continue reading The Goose of the End Times

Trees Belong in the Fire Place

Maybe you found yourself with an unwanted, leafy bark-faced monster growing from the fertile soil of your own backyard. They do that, you know; unexpectedly rising from the earth like something out of a pollen cloaked nightmare to spread their vile seed across hearth and home. I’m talking about the thing we’re all familiar with these days; trees. For those of us who suffer from allergies a tree represents the thing that we hate the most in this world which is why tree service in Queens NY is so popular. Who in this city of worship to steel and concrete needs the like of wood and green-leafed pollen seeders? Not me, friends, not me. The men and women who brave the heights that these natural ‘wonders’ can climb to are those that we should give our deepest thanks to. After living in Atlanta during the last spring, I would come out every morning to discover my car coated in a fine yellow dust of murder; pollen.

Allergies are no joke. Continue reading Trees Belong in the Fire Place